


You & Me

by charmingoutlaws (twdsunshine)



Category: Sons of Anarchy
Genre: F/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-19 13:28:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15510891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twdsunshine/pseuds/charmingoutlaws
Summary: The aftermath of Jax’s death.  The club is reeling, and the President isn’t sure he’s strong enough to take on the pressures of his new position.





	You & Me

The mood was somber as the remaining members of SAMCRO crowded into Scoops, filling the small space with their broad, leather-clad bodies despite their waning numbers.  You’d heard the news of course, the whole town had.  The prince was dead.  Just like his father, Jax Teller had met his end under the wheels of a semi, staining the highway red and leaving behind a gaping hole at the charter’s table.  As the men settled themselves, some on the high stools that lined the counter and others around the small round tables along one side of the room, you took in the bloodshot eyes and shocked expressions and felt your own grief fall heavy on your shoulders.   **  
**

Perhaps heavier than your grief though was your concern for your best friend, Chibs Telford.  You’d clocked the President’s patch neatly stitched on to the chest of his kutte as soon as he’d entered, and knew that that meant it was up to him to keep the club moving forward in the wake of the tragedy.  Your relationship with the Scotsman was complicated at the best of times.  Your paths had crossed when you’d found yourselves following your friends and becoming a Crow Eater, fawning over the Sons and offering yourself up to them as a source of release and excitement.  It had never come as easily to you though as it had to the others, and you’d found yourself drawn to the man with the scars on his face, who treated you more gently, with more respect, than some of the others.  And then one night, he hadn’t laid a finger on you at all.  You’d talked, extensively, over coffee and, later, breakfast, and from that moment on, you’d been claimed, not as an Old Lady, but as a confidante, a companion, and that was just fine with you.  It gave you an in with the club which held no expectations, and your fondness for Chibs only continued to increase as time passed.

You watched as the Scot levered himself to his feet, sinking a shot of whiskey like it was water, before wiping his hand over his mouth and dropping his gaze to the floor.  A part of you longed to go to him, to wrap your arms around him and reassure him that it was all going to be okay, but you knew, if you did that, he’d break down.  He needed to be strong for a little while longer.

‘Right.’  His voice was a low rasp, thick with emotion, but the chatter in the room was quiet enough that he could be heard regardless.  ‘C’mon, gents.  Let’s get this outta the way.  I wan’ everybody at the table.  Let’s go.’

He pulled open the door that led up to the MC church on the first floor, waiting whilst his brothers filed past him and began to climb the stairs.  His eyes met yours, lingering for just a moment before he turned his back on the room and followed his men, letting the door swing closed behind him.  

You could picture them up there, standing around awkwardly, waiting for the new officers to take their places, places that only days and weeks before had been filled by dead men.  There had been so much loss.  You knew Chibs would sit at the head of the table, the gavel in his hand, whilst Tig would sit at his left-hand, as the newly appointed VP.  You idly wondered whether Happy would retain his Sergeant-at-Arms title, and figured it made sense if he did.  The man was made for the role.

The clock that Chucky had mounted on the wall as he sought to make the old ice-cream shop a little more homely ticked monotonously, the minutes dragging as you strained your ears to hear the dull rumble of voices from above.  You couldn’t make out the words, but Chibs’ voice was immediately distinguishable by his accent and you drew comfort from the fact that his tone was even, his volume low.  He was holding it together, just as you knew he would.  

About a half hour after their new President had ordered them upstairs, you heard the scraping of chairs that announced their imminent return.  The faces that trooped back down the stairs were downcast, and you knew then that there had been no talk about the future, not today.  The meeting had been about memorialising their fallen comrade, respecting his memory and making a promise that his sacrifice would not be wasted.

Happy was the first to pass you, his eyes watery.  To see the group’s most lethal assassin in such a sorry state just drove home the notion that the club had been shattered by Jax’s death, and you reached up to lay a hand against the outlaw’s stubbled cheek, giving him a small smile as another tear escaped and trickled down the side of your finger.  ‘Get some rest.  And get somebody to take a look at that wrist, okay?’

He nodded before making his exit, and you watched his retreating back as he headed across the road to his bike, unable to blame him for making a hasty escape from the oppressive silence that hung over the room.

As you watched him pull away from the sidewalk, a warm hand covered your own, and you glanced up at Tig as he squeezed your fingers.  ‘Think we’re all heading out, princess.’

You nodded, pushing yourself up on tiptoes to wrap your arms around his neck, your feet almost leaving the ground as he hugged you back, his hold painfully tight.  You wondered if he would be going back to an empty house, and hoped that Venus would be there to comfort him.  As unconventional as the relationship was, he needed someone, though he’d never admit it.  

‘Look after him,’ he murmured to you as he released you, his eyes seeking Chibs where he stood in the far corner, his expression vacant as he leant against the wall.  ‘He’s hanging on by a thread.  Needs someone to talk to.’

‘That’s what I’m here for.’

‘Good girl.’  He bent to press a kiss to your forehead, before he too disappeared out into the night, closely followed by the other surviving members and their closest acquaintances.  

You swallowed down the lump in your throat as you made your way over to your friend, the man that dominated your life, and your thoughts, if you were honest about it.  He was still staring off into nowhere, seemingly oblivious to the fact that you were now alone, and you felt him jerk when you took a gentle hold of his arm.  ‘Hey, Chibby.’

‘Everyone gone?’

‘Yep.  Think everyone just needed to get out of here.’

‘Right.’

You shepherded him towards one of the seats, leaving him for a moment to fetch a beer, before dropping down beside him, twisting your hands together on the table as you tried to find the right words to say to bring him back to you.  ‘I’m so sorry.’  Your voice cracked on the last word and you squeezed your eyes tight shut as you fought to keep control.  You needed to be strong for him now.  You could deal with your own grief later.  

‘Aye, I know, lass.’  Your choked sob had cracked through the facade that he’d thrown up to get through the evening, and he ran his fingers through his hair as he watched you regain your composure, his eyes kind, though his mouth remained set in a grim line.  ‘S’a damn shame, it really is.  Waste of a young life.’

You could only nod, waiting for him to go on, knowing that he had more that he needed to say.  

‘I jus’ don’t understand what’d make him do somethin’ like that.  He had so much t’ live for, those two little lads…’  He tailed off to wipe over his eyes with the back of his hand, and you noticed he was shaking under the strain of his emotion.  ‘We were gettin’ ourselves out of a mess, we were.  We didn’ need him t’ go and…  Shit!’  He lashed out, swiping his arm across the table and sending the bottle you’d brought him flying across the room where it exploded in a shower of glass and golden droplets.  

‘Was there another way out?’  You had to ask the question, though you knew it may anger him further.  It had been bugging you for days, knowing the position the club had found itself in, the position Jax had found himself in.  You certainly couldn’t see another way out, but maybe it was clearer from the inside.

But rather than biting back with simple solutions and defences, Chibs’ shoulders slumped and you saw him deflate as quickly as he’d become riled up.  ‘There had t’ be.  We’d have found another way.  We just needed a little more time.’

‘He didn’t have time, Chibby, not with the Mayhem vote hanging over him.’

‘We’d have found a way, alright?  We just woulda!’

He crumbled then, the strong man before you curling in on himself as hiccuping sobs forced their way up his throat, his reddening face hidden behind his curtain of hair.  You reached out to him, stroking your hand over his back, before finding his own and lacing your fingers together, holding on to him as he fell apart, anchoring him to the present.  ‘I know, sweetheart, I know.  We’re never going to understand what was going through his mind, we’re never going to get it.  But Jax was pretty smart, and if he thought that was his only option, then I’m pretty sure that made all the others dangerous and bloody for all of you.’

He didn’t speak, but you saw him nod, so you carried on, rubbing your thumb over his knuckles as his cries began to subside.  ‘But what he did for you before he went… I mean, killing Marks and Barosky, that was him, right?’

‘Mmhmm, gotta be.’

‘Well, then he’s offered you up a clean slate right here.  You can build on this Chibs, you can make this club what him and JT wanted it to be, do things right, earn legit.  That was the point of all of this, wasn’t it?’

‘I don’ know if I’m the right man for the job, lass.’  There was a quiet resignation to his voice now that worried you more than the tears.  ‘How am I meant t’ lead knowin’ that it should be him holdin’ that gavel?  I can’t do this, not on my own.’

‘You’re not on your own!  You’ve got Tig at your side, and Happy, and the rest of the guys.  Every single person in this family has your back, Chibby.’

‘It’s not enough.  I mean, I…  I jus-’

‘You loved him.’

‘Aye, I did.  Loved tha’ kid like he was my own.’

‘I know.’

He fell silent for a moment, before surprising you as he wrapped a strong hand around your wrist and tugged you into his lap, snaking his arms around your waist.  His face was buried in your shoulder, and you trailed your fingers over the back of his neck, whispering soothing words into his ear.  ‘It’s okay, Chibby, it’ll all be okay, I promise.  You can do this, you can.’

You sat like that for a long while, holding each other, until the darkness outside shifted into the silvery-grey of dawn.  Only then did the President look up, finding your eyes and giving you a weak smile, before cupping your cheek and pulling your lips down to his.  It was a soft kiss, chaste, but it was further than you’d gone with him since you’d shrugged off your Crow Eater title, and you felt yourself stiffen a little at the contact.  ‘If I’m gonna do this, I’m gonna need ya, love.’

‘You’ve got me, Chibs.  I’ll always be here for you, you know that.’

‘Nah, I mean, I’m gonna need an Old Lady t’ keep the girls in line.’  He thought for a moment, before smirking and adding, ‘Or t’ keep me in line, more like.’

‘Chibs, I-I dont think now is the time to-’

‘Oh, it’s long past time, sweetheart, I know that.  I shoulda done this a long time ago, but I jus’…  I didn’t wanna drag ya in to the chaos, y’know?  But I love ya, I do, an’ I need ya with me if I’m gonna live up to Jackie’s legacy.  I can’t do it without ya.’

You couldn’t deny him, this beautiful, broken man, that was holding on to you like a lifeline.  You could already see the strain of his new responsibility on his face, and you knew that he’d need somebody to hold on to in the dark days ahead.  It would be an uphill battle to get the club earning enough to survive, recruiting new members along the way, and the whole time living with the pressure of doing it for Jax, for JT, and for everyone else that had been lost.  

‘Well, I guess, I can’t turn down the President now, can I?’ you teased, trying half-heartedly to lighten the mood, stroking your fingers over his cheeks and ghosting along the thin white lines that curved up from either side of his mouth.  ‘We’ll do it together, okay?  You and me.’

‘You and me,’ he agreed, before pulling you in for another kiss that went on long enough that, for just a moment, you forgot about everything else.


End file.
